There Was Never Any Time Before.
The thing about staying at home, having no schedule, skipping vacations is: everything I once ignored is now magnified and impossible to ignore.
For example, our 16-year-old stained carpet became unbearable. Along with it, the obnoxious (also 16-year-old) paint colors on our walls became … obnoxious. The cheap vinyl floors we’d chosen for our toddlers became embarrassing.
I don’t really care about appearances. But when we canceled our vacation and Bill suggested we spend our vacation money to fix up the house, we ended up with new paint, carpet and floors: the equivalent of a new house.
We did all of it with extreme gratitude that Bill had a job. And then we reorganized and prepared to donate a full room’s worth of stuff which, hopefully, we’ll be able to donate soon.
But fixing the house isn’t the only result of this pandemic: I’m noticing everything. For the first time in forever, I pay attention to the weather: the temperature, the clouds, the extreme green of spring. I am conscious of the birds, the squirrels, the rabbits, the deer in a new way. Outdoor life is even more precious to me now.
I’ve got vegetables growing in pots on the porch, and I check on them daily. Last year, our tomato plants were virtually ignored and didn’t do well. This year, I have seen every new sprout as it pops.
There was never any time before to notice things.
Dylan and Shane, too, have taken on new ventures. Shane has started researching subjects other than amusement parks, and he’s gotten better at Jeopardy. He’s started a regular workout routine, and he’s drumming again. He’s revamping his whole room for the first time ever.
Dylan has been working on new music. He and Shane just released an online album of comedic songs – some with real potential. They each wrote their own lyrics; some songs are quite funny. They spent almost as much time naming the band as they did recording their songs. The result is an album called Reverse Psychology by their band, Glass of Milk.
Dylan not only finished spring semester, he took additional online courses in May. With those complete, he – like many others – became enraged about police brutality and the racism in this country. But Dylan didn’t protest – we’re still in an area that’s barely open. Instead, he deleted all of his social media app’s. This gave him more time to do everything and he’s been hanging out with us, and doing more productive things, ever since.
Both boys have started bicycling again, although Shane really started the movement. After dinner, Shane would say, “I’m going out for a spin,” and disappear for an hour. After Dylan deleted his app’s, he started biking with Shane. They go so often, in fact, that I’ve had to walk the dog all by myself.
This is fine, since the weather is glorious, and I’m spending quality time with Loki, who is still learning how to belong with people. And of course, there’s the high value of being outside.
In fact, life is more precious to me now. I am so aware that we’re lucky, that we’re alive, that we’re healthy. I am so aware that what matters is more than grades or jobs. Nothing else matters when there’s a threat to health.
What matters most is family. I miss my job. I miss vacations, restaurants, movies. I miss being able to just sit and talk with my friends. But as a family, we are making the most of our time together.
And that’s simply beautiful.