He Doesn’t Join Those Clubs.

I found this in my archives – and it hadn’t yet been posted. It makes me remember (1) what life was like before it wasn’t normal and (2) how insignificant my worries usually are. Here’s an example:

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Dylan is getting great grades. He loves college. He has friends. He’s in a band, and the band had its first gig in Nashville! It’s pretty cool.

But Dylan isn’t doing anything related to getting into the music industry – and by that I mean, he’s doing a lot but nothing related to exploring his career options.

Belmont University is in the heart of Nashville, and there are a ton of resources at his disposal. There are hundreds – literally hundreds – of clubs on campus for people interested in the music industry. There are a few dozen industry clubs that are free to join and encourage students to volunteer at professional events, like the Grammys and the Country Music Awards.

Still others encourage students to help promote various bands, which teaches students about promotion. And there are choral groups galore, none of which “work” for him this semester.

Plus, there are a slew of internship and part-time job opportunities that open up virtually every day – and go straight into Dylan’s e-mailbox.

But Dylan doesn’t open his emails. He doesn’t join those clubs. He doesn’t look for internships or relevant part-time jobs, and he’s taken up Door-Dashing instead.

I know he’s a freshman, which is why I didn’t question his behavior (much) during his first semester. He said he was adjusting to campus life – and he was. He said he had enough to worry about with his classes – and he did.

He adjusted quite nicely, in fact.

So we talked about it over the break, and I suggested that he simply “add in” some things to his schedule, one thing at a time. And I gave him some suggestions of where to find those things, and how to manage doing just one or two things toward finding a solid future in the industry he loves.

I mean, isn’t that why we sent him to this college – the one he loves so much that he gave up a full ride elsewhere?

But six weeks into the second semester, he still hadn’t added anything at all to his life – at least, not anything relevant to his career. No clubs, no internships, no volunteering.

He’s enjoying his band, sure, and that’s a really great thing. But unless his band is the best band in the whole wide world – and first bands are rarely the best band right out of the gate – he’s not going to have a lucrative future starring as the lead singer of Open Casket Wedding.

Really, I am happy for him.

But as a mom, I’d be happier if he’d put at least one foot forward, as if he were taking a step.

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