I Know He Did His Best.
The following is an email I wrote to the Special Education Coordinator AND the Principal of Dylan’s high school, just a few minutes after he finished his No-Computer-Accommodation AP Test:
After the many, many panicked emails I sent this week, I wanted to send a follow-up now that Dylan is done with his test (without the computer accommodation).
Dylan has not written with a pencil, other than a sentence or two, since second grade (when he was only writing a sentence or two!) – and today he had an extended-time test, four pencils, and three essays to write. We worked together last night to prepare, and I tried to keep my sheer panic out of the conversation. (I don’t think Dylan knew how scared I was.) He made a pile of differently sized pencils, a variety of fidgets, gum and coffee… and he practiced multiple choice questions for hours in case he bombed all three essays.
I told him not to worry – that he’d matured a lot since second grade – and that handwriting doesn’t count (even if it does). This morning, Dylan – who does not often get nervous – was very anxious, but confident that he’d done all he could do to prepare.
When Dylan finished the AP test, he texted me and said – (and I quote) – “the test went great.” Not “awful” or “okay” or even “good.” He said it went GREAT. While I don’t have the details, I’m thrilled that he felt GREAT about it, and that he proved to himself that he could do something that he originally thought he couldn’t do. He wrote THREE COLLEGE-LEVEL ESSAYS with a pencil!
I don’t know what his score will be, but I know he did his best. It turned out to be a tremendous learning experience and a self-esteem boost.
I also know that I inundated you both with my fearful-Mom emails, and that you did the absolute best you could under trying circumstances. I’m so mad at the College Board that I’m considering having my younger son take the ACT instead! But I want you to know that I was never angry with you – so if the emails came across as angry, I do apologize. I was frustrated with College Board, who did nothing to help or answer my questions.
But YOU answered ALL of my questions. And you did a lot for Dylan (while also working with me), so that he will have his accommodations by the next AP test. And I think you are both absolutely wonderful for ALL you do on behalf of these kids. We’re really lucky to have you at our high school.
Thanks for your patience with me. And thanks so much for doing so much!
Dylan’s principal not only wrote back – but she said she’d checked on Dylan before and after the test, and even asked the exam proctor how he did – and said that he was positive and upbeat through the entire experience.
She has 1,500 kids in that school, and she took time out of her busy day to pay attention to mine. There are few reasons for gratitude with regard to Dylan and high school, but the staff at that high school is on the top of my list.
And Dylan? He was positive and upbeat! He says he wrote three of the best essays he’s ever written in his life – with a pencil.
Regardless of the score he gets, I am so proud I could burst.