They Had a Huddle About Me.

Shane was in his first “huddle” last week.

“A huddle is something the group does when they want to talk about something serious,” Shane said.

The group.

Shane is in fourth grade. I didn’t realize groups started in fourth grade. He’s referring to cliques – the groups that made me feel like a loser for every waking moment of every day from fifth grade until I left for college.

Being an outcast myself, I didn’t know how the group process worked – until Shane told me what the four boys did.

“They had a huddle about me,” he said. “All the boys got in a huddle to decide if they would let me into the group. Nick didn’t want me to be in the group. I could see them in there talking about stuff. And then Andrew and Nick did Rock-Paper-Scissors and Andrew won, so I got into the group.”

I almost vomited. They decided on Shane’s social future with Rock-Paper-Scissors?!

And THAT mentality is what kept me an outcast for my entire young life?

Nick still doesn’t want Shane in the group. I don’t know Nick. But Nick hit Shane in second grade. And as a result, I hate Nick. I’d like to have my own huddle and throw Nick out of the group.

“He’s just a little rough,” Shane told me today.

Luckily, I’m not making the decisions for Shane or his peers. These are tough lessons that have to be learned without my input.

The group built itself during half-hour increments, at recess, over the course of several months, and I realize that it’s not likely to stay congealed for very long. But Shane is happy today, and I’m hopeful that no one in the group – even Nick – will hurt him in the near future.

I’m hopeful.

Without my asking, Shane told me about his first huddle. “We had to decide what to do about this guy in our class who said two curse words. We decided we should go talk to him.”

So the group is trying to make the world a better place. I’m proud that Shane is a part of it.

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