I Can Enjoy a Bit of Solitude.

I have been sick for a week. I’m definitely getting better, but I haven’t been out and about much.

As a result, I didn’t make my annual trek to Pittsburgh this year – which makes me sad. But I also didn’t chaperone Shane’s trip to Busch Gardens today, which makes me even sadder.

This morning, I drove Shane to his chartered bus at school at 4:00 in the morning. It was the least I could do, allowing my husband and Dylan to sleep in – so that they could be up and ready for their big day, too.

Because this is the weekend that Dylan is rewarded for all of his efforts in school since January.

He’s gotten substantially more than 200 teacher signatures on his “signature sheet,” which means he’s had to talk to every teacher after every class except P.E., virtually every day. In addition, he’s had to do five, 1.5-hour shifts of homework every week. He did it all – and his grades reflect his efforts, although not as much as I might hope.

Regardless, this weekend, Dylan gets to go to North Carolina to see his online friend who lives there. And given the circumstances of Shane’s field trip, Shane is going with them – because I was supposed to be in Pittsburgh. Bill and Dylan and Shane are all currently at Busch Gardens, on their way to North Carolina.

I am left utterly alone in this sprawling, quiet house.

Some people would be thrilled with this turn of events, I’m sure – having a whole weekend to do whatever I want, no worries about the house or food or what the kids are doing… But me? I am sitting here texting everyone. I am lonely.

I keep thinking that this is what the house will be like in a few years, when both kids have left home. As I was brushing my teeth (at 4:00 a.m., and again at 10:00), I realized I really don’t have any reason to brush my teeth. I probably won’t even leave the house today. In fact, I really have no reason to get out of bed.

Well, I do have a dog. Thank God for the dog. She needed someone to feed her and let her outside to use the facilities. Of course, the dog is ten – so she will probably not be here by the time the kids go to college.

I suppose I can enjoy a bit of solitude.

But it is nicer being needed.

 

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